Hotashi

There have been many attacks recently against Christians in India and it is hitting really close to home. There have been attacks in my father’s town, Mangalore, against various Christian groups. I have numerous family members living there, including my 80 year old grandmother whom I got to see this year after ten years. Attacks are conducted by a Hindu extremist group who target non-Hindus in India. Currently they are focusing on Christians because one group of Christians are attempting to help the poor, orphans, and widows who are struggling to live. Rather than targeting this one Christian group they are attacking many different Christian groups, including ones that have been in Mangalore for hundreds of years. There are many more attacks that have been carried out in surrounding areas, especially in the state of Orissa. These attacks are being taken out on everyone, including children, women, and even nuns. One priest was even attacked with a machete during a Sunday morning service. Churches have been set on fire, Christian homes have been vandelized, and Christians have been beaten simply because they are Christian. One Hindu journalist who wrote an article stating that people should be able to choose their religion was beaten by members of this Hindu extremist group. Basically, those who do not conform to the beliefs of this Hindu extremist group are targetted and beaten into conformity.

These incidents are scary and a stark reminder that religious violence is very much alive and should not be tolerated. Nobody, regardless of what their religious affiliation is, should be persecuted. I am asking you to please pray for peace and safety of all religious groups in India. Also please pray for the safety of my family members. I don’t want the next trip I take to India be because I have to bury my family member(s). Thank you.

You can read more about what’s going on in India on this blog.

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I woke up to a full blown thurnderstorm this morning. I don’t think that has ever happened before. Normally I feel quite down when we have rainy weather, but this time I feel quite relaxed by it. We’ve gotten a lot more rain than usual this summer and it’s a nice change from the droughts we’ve been having over the past couple of years. I remember how everyone’s lawns would be yellow and crispy, and now they are green and lucious. So beautiful! I hope we have more summers like this. I’m sure all those people who have to actually go outside today are glaring at me. =P

I moved back to Waterloo today and plan on staying here until my lease is up at the end of August. I met up with one of my MA friends and we walked around the area for two and a half hours just catching up on things. It was nice to be able to do that again (being at home made me have a very limited social life). I’m partially happy to know that I’m ahead of so many others in our program with the progress of my research. But I’m still worried about not being able to graduate on time. I’m in a stage now where I can’t really do much and I need to wait on a couple of things before I can get cracking on analysis and writing. I’m trusting God and trying not to worry.

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I recently have been making the effort to read my Bible before I go to sleep. It’s not much, but I want to become a better servant. From this, I have been thinking about two things that I came across recently. The first is Matthew 5:5 which states, “Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” What exactly is that supposed to mean? It can’t mean that those who are humble will come to power, because that is far from true. Those who are humble in this world get trampled on. Those who are weak are crushed and taken advantage of. Those who are seen as benefitting society are ignored and demonized. And if this verse refers to the earth as in land, then that doesn’t make sense either. Since everything is privatized now, it is hardly the meek who inherit land. You have to fight for it, and take advantage of an exploitative system in order to step on others to gain a place of privelege to be able to own land. So what exactly does this verse mean?

A second line that I’ve been thinking about is a lyric from the song Be my escape by Relient K. It states, “But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair.” This is a really interesting statement, and it’s true. Grace is not equal. Why are some people spared their lives while others die from terminal illnesses, unfortunate circumstances, or freak accidents? Why are some people born into poverty and others are born into wealth? None are worthy of a better life than others, really. It is by mere grace how lucky our circumstances are. And no, I do not believe in the myth of meritorcracy. Anyone who has ever acheived anything through their hard work has also cut others of opportunities and exploited others (usually through the use of an existing exploitative social and economic structure). I cannot stand here today and say that I am where I am because of the hard work I have done. Sure my hard work has contributed to it, but I am not so foolish to think that I was placed in a position of privelege where I could afford my education, my food, my shelter, etc. And this place of privelege is based on a system where profit is gained off of the exploitation of workers. Sorry, I digress.

Life is not fair. I am blessed by the grace of God who has given me the access to many places of privelege, but I am also disadvantaged in many ways because of my gender, my race, my ethnicity, my stature, etc. Should I sit back and accept these disadvantages claiming that God has not given me the grace to have such privelege? I know some people would interpret some scriptures this way, which I think is bullshit. I don’t think God applauds social injustice or passivity towards it. Yes, God’s grace does not make life fair, but that doesn’t mean we should accept the unfairness of life. We should try to make this world a better place for everyone because none of us are worthy. Nobody is perfect, so why should we accept that some have the right to privelege while others don’t?

That’s what I’ve been thinking about lately…

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I’ve been really busy with school lately. I had a mini breakdown and an anxiety attack last week. The stress has been really getting to me. Easter couldn’t have come at a better time, really. I went home this weekend to spend time with my family and relax. Church didn’t have the same effect like it had in the past, but it was good to be back. The message of Easter is always something that I need to cherish and remind myself of. And I’ve realized that I have been forgetting that my value does not lie anywhere but in God. I guess I’ve been trying to gain validation through completing my Masters, conducting my own research, and in other places. These accomplishments are a nice pat on the back, but day by day I am feeling less satisfied and more burdened. Things that once excited me now make me cringe. So I am now going to try to make a conscious effort to just do my best for Jesus and not care about impressing anyone else. Life is more enjoyable that way.

Just to add in something random, I am really hungry but whenever I walk out of my room into the kitchen I can smell the bag of garbage still waiting to be thrown out. I lose my appetite immediately, but I’m so hungry. Why can’t people do their chores on time? >_>

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Happy New Year everyone! I hope that 2008 will bring you joy and happiness, but most importantly, gratitude. No matter what our position is in life we always should thank God for the blessings we have. 2007 was a bitter-sweet year for me. There were a lot of hard moments, such as deaths close to me, having to say goodbye to my close friend Maki, and having to return to school for another year with different living conditions. But there were also many happy moments, like my engagement with Jack.

Speaking of our engagement, we had our engagement party this past Friday. It was a lot of fun and we had a good turnout. We had a lot more food than we were expecting so we had to eat a lot the following couple of days. For the most part it ran pretty smoothyl up until the end. The security guards didn’t tell us that we had to be out of the room by 10:45 so we were frantically trying to pack up everything and get out so they cound finish the inspection. My feet were killing me by the end of the night too. Other than those two things, I had a great time.

Well that’s all from me. Hopefully I will be able to blog more often in the next month. I shouldn’t be TOO busy. =P

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